Ann Truscott | Sales Assistant / Home Duties
I have lived with terminal cancer for five years. The original cancer was in my breast, after a ten year remission it reappeared in my bones, the past year in my brain. You cannot cure stage four cancer, you can hope to buy more time and thanks to five years of constant chemotherapy I have. My oncologist later confided in me that she didn’t expect me to survive six months.
Strangely enough, as someone who lives with death as a reality rather than an abstract I haven't given it much thought. If I allow a tiny tendril of my brain to go there I quickly pull it back, plenty of time to think about that later…but what if there’s not…no, it will keep…my head is well and truly buried in the sand and it’s happy there.
I want to know what happens next in my family and friends lives and I hate the thought that I won't...I hate missing out.
I have always acknowledged the fact that one out of one people die but this is not fair, it’s simply just not fair. I know I need to make plans, I need to leave instructions and wishes to make it easier for my family. Cremation or burial, neither are appealing, a third choice?
Cancer wasn't in my script, life is a crap shoot and I got crapped on. Death has become a taboo subject, we tiptoe around it. I envy the openness of my grandparent’s day although I don't think I would want to be laid out in the front room.
Am I angry? Absolutely, but if you ever met me you would never know it...must keep smiling, I would hate to upset anyone...that's the way I roll xxx
—Ann Truscott (2015)
Editor's note: On Thursday 23 November 2017, Ann died, surrounded by her beloved family. Ann's letter was one of the first received for this project, written in February 2015. I'm absolutely honoured to have had the pleasure of meeting Ann, and to have had her contribute to this project. Sending love and blessings to Ann's cherished family and friends—including her two beloved Staffies and chickens XX
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